Timeless Bonds: Ancestral Memories and Thanksgiving Grace

Davar Ardalan
6 min readNov 22, 2024

--

As I turn the pages of my aunt’s photo album, I am overwhelmed by a sense of awe and gratitude. My aunt Pari, now 95, sits beside me, her presence a living testament to nearly a century of fortitude, elegance, and trailblazing achievement. She has always been the focal point of our family — a pioneer in every sense, carrying the Ardalan legacy with grace, strength, and as a modern woman an unshakable commitment to tradition.

This Thanksgiving feels especially meaningful as Pari will grace us at our home. Together with my husband, John Smith, my daughter Samira, my sons Aman, Amir, and Saied (via FaceTime from London), we will prepare a little feast, telling stories — always telling stories. Pari, as always, is bringing her own special touch to the table: a peach dessert she plans to prepare, just as she has done countless times before.

My aunt Pari Ardalan Malek

Born into the storied Ardalan family, deeply rooted in Iranian culture and history, Pari’s path took her across the world. In the late 1940s, she lived for several years in Washington, D.C., where her father served as the Financial Attaché at the Iranian Embassy, before pursuing her education at Wilson College in Chambersburg, Pennsylvania. There, she earned her degree in English and Psychology, with dreams of becoming a teacher.

However, her life took an extraordinary turn during the summer before her senior year, when she interned at the United Nations in New York. Enamored with the experience, she applied for a job after graduation and was hired by the Social Welfare Department at the U.N., working in the credit department. Pari was the first Iranian woman to work at the United Nations.

During this time, our great-uncle Dr. Ali Gholi Ardalan, a diplomat and Iran’s Ambassador to the United Nations, welcomed her into his home in New York. Pari became an integral part of both her professional and family circles, making her mark as a trendsetter for our family. Her story is one of courage, intelligence, and determination — a young Iranian woman carving out a career at the United Nations in the 1950s, setting an extraordinary example for generations to come.

Another photograph shows Pari (third from left) seated with her cousins — Chirin, Parvaneh, and Nassereh. Their elegance and confidence reflect the values instilled in them by their family and their shared legacy.

Pari, as always, exudes an aura of leadership and warmth, and her influence extends far beyond her career. She has been the beating heart of so many of our family gatherings and “dorehs” over the decades, her grace and legendary hospitality creating moments we all treasure. Her culinary mastery even led her to write a cookbook, blending tradition and creativity into every dish she prepared.

Another famous Ardalan “doreh”

Pari’s life took another remarkable turn when she married Issa Malek, a diplomat whose career brought them to the global stage. As the wife of the Ambassador to Sweden, Finland, and Iceland, Pari embraced her role with elegance and dedication, continuing her legacy of hospitality and grace. In the midst of it all, she also raised three beautiful children, cementing her legacy as a guiding force for generations.

The photograph above from her album, taken in Masjid Sulayman, Iran, circa 1964, captures my parents and grandparents holding hands in a joyous family dance. Pari had come to visit us, and the moment radiates joy and connection, set against the rugged beauty of Iran’s hills. It is a perfect metaphor for the enduring nature of our family bonds, a testament to the strength and love that flow through generations of the Ardalan family.

This extraordinary photograph, taken over 110 years ago, commemorates the marriage of my great uncle Amanollah Ardalan (Haj Ezol Mamaalek) to Nezhat o Doleh, the daughter of Majd oDoleh. Gifted by Mozaffar al-Din Shah Qajar.

Another historic photo, came by way of our cousin. It provides a rare glimpse into the early years of a family deeply rooted in tradition and history. The image captures my great uncle Amanollah Ardalan with his brothers, all sons of Haj Fakhrolmolk and Abbasseh (Haji Valieh).

Turning another page, I am struck by the continuity captured in these photographs: the same Ardalan brothers, now grown, appear in both images. In the earlier portrait, taken over 110 years ago, they stand as young boys, dressed in ceremonial attire to commemorate Amanollah Ardalan’s marriage. Decades later, in the black-and-white photograph, they reappear as dignified men, including my grandfather Abbas Ardalan, our great-uncle Amanollah Ardalan.

Ardalan “Doreh” February 1966

These images together tell a story of time, growth, and unwavering legacy. As boys, they embodied the promise of the Ardalan family’s future. As men, their wisdom and strength carried forward a lineage that traces its roots to Kurdish sovereignty, leaving an indelible mark on our history and heritage.

Four generations of love and legacy: From left, Aunt Pari, Khanoom Mamman (my great-grandmother), my father Nader Ardalan holding my brother Karim, and my late grandmother Farangis Davar Ardalan. A timeless moment of connection and family pride.

As I reflect on these photographs and the life Pari has lived, I am overwhelmed with gratitude. Her presence at every gathering reminds us of the values that define us: love, hospitality, tenacity, and a deep respect for our heritage.

A cherished family moment: My late mother, Laleh Bakhtiar, my father, Nader Ardalan, my sister Mani, and me. A snapshot of love and connection from our family album.
Photo of my sister Mani Helene Ardalan and I in 1966

This Thanksgiving, as we gather around the table, I feel a profound sense of pride — not just for Pari’s extraordinary achievements, but for the way she has carried our family’s traditions and stories forward. Through her, we are reminded of where we come from, of the sacrifices and triumphs of those who came before us, and of the strength we draw from their legacy.

As I think about the stories she’s shared and the love she’s given, my mind drifts to a photo tucked away in the album — one of her with her arms wrapped tightly around me when I was just five years old. In that moment, her warmth and protection were the world to me, just as they have been for our entire family.

Pari Ardalan Malek and Iran Davar Ardalan

Together, with laughter, stories, and the warmth of her peach dessert, we will honor the unshakable bonds of the Ardalan family this Thanksgiving — a legacy that lives on in every shared meal, every gathering, and every act of love.

I love you Ameh Pari!

This content was crafted with the assistance of artificial intelligence, which contributed to structuring the narrative, ensuring grammatical accuracy, summarizing key points, and enhancing the readability and coherence of the material.

--

--

Davar Ardalan
Davar Ardalan

Written by Davar Ardalan

Founder TulipAI. National Geographic, NPR News, SecondMuse, White House PIF Alum.